Friday, August 27, 2004

Smelling the Sights

Hey Kids! Have finished the crappy debt-collecting job. Hurrah. On Monday start at Bank of NZ. Apparently have to use Excel and Access to process tonnes of data wot they've collected. Sort of blagged it and said 'yeah I can do that' - as one tends to in job interviews when thinking of the money; but I think it might be a bit trickier than showing the senior folks of Didcot how to use a mouse.

Went to Rotorua last weekend. The earth's crust is very thin there, so steam rises from the ground, and sulphuric ming wafts past from time to time. I imagine being in New York with
Jerome would be similar. It was my first trip out of the city, and the scenery was all green and covered in volcanic lumps and bumps which looked like many Hobbitons. Lotsa sheep!

Luging. The website makes it sound all glamourous, in fact it is all about sitting on a plastic tray with wheels and rolling down a windy track as fast as you dare. Good pointless fun.

Kiwi Piddles to Olympic Gold!

Tom riggs tom riggs tom riggs

That's what the newsreader said...

Friday, August 13, 2004

Special German Words

At school I tried to learn German. I've forgotten all my vocabulary apart from a few 'special' words. I think they're called compound nouns, where two or more words are joined together to make a new one. Like these:
Handschuh = Hand shoe = Glove

Luftkissenboot = Air cushion boat = Hovercraft

Brustwarze = Breast wart = Nipple

Durchfall = Through fall = Diarrhoea

I reckon that's enough to cope with most eventualities.

Friday, August 06, 2004

9 to 5

After spending a couple of weeks trawling around agencies pretending to be keen and doing typing and Excel tests and stuff I finally got a job.

I have to look after accounts on behalf of various businesses, and ring their debtors to enquire when they might feel like paying their bills. Had about five minutes training, and know nothing about accounts. Have a Windows 95 computer which runs pre-historic software which has no GUI and cannot be operated by mouse. Its one redeeming feature is that it occasionally causes amusement by displaying an error message which simply reads 'WHAT THE FUCK!'

Under these circumstances I don't feel obliged to do anything right. The money is OK, the people are nice enough, and there's good coffee for free. Hope to have an interview for something better next week.

A monkey struggling with a crap computer, yesterday